Yesterday, I said that maybe some of the other disciples simply followed when Peter decided to go fishing again, having established their lives as followers for three years. It would be easy to just follow someone new, especially with the same group of guys you've been following with for so long.
And maybe it didn't even strike you when I said that - that Peter decided to go fishing. Maybe that seemed like the most natural thing in the world to you.
But it struck me.
Why did it seem so easy for me to believe that Peter would be the one with the plan? That Peter would be the one leading the way back into the old life? That Peter would be the one with the idea to go fishing?
It does seem natural. It seems like a perfect fit. We know that Peter was often the first to speak, often impetuously. We have tons of examples of him just saying whatever was on his mind. We could probably even make an argument that maybe Peter had a little bit of ADHD and was the kind of guy who couldn't just sit still and do nothing. He had to be doing something. So he decides to go fishing.
But I think it's more than that. I think there's something in our hearts that draws us to Peter as the catalyst, something that goes a little more under our radar, but strikes right into the core of our being.
Remember that the last time we see Peter before he's stripping his tunic and jumping off the boat to swim to shore, he's sitting in a courtyard around a fire, denying that he even knows Jesus. He looks up and sees Jesus make eye contact with him, and he knows - he's betrayed the Teacher he just called the Son of God. The last moment Peter has in what was supposed to be his new life...is a moment of failure.
Now, Jesus is dead, the tomb is empty, a couple of sightings have been made, but we haven't gotten any inclination yet that Jesus has spoken directly to Peter, that they've had the reconciliation that Peter needs.
The story must go on, the Good News must be proclaimed, more disciples must be made, but how is Peter supposed to believe that he's the one to do it?
He's a betrayer.
So if there's anyone on Easter Monday who doesn't believe his life can or should be or might be any different, it's got to be Peter. If there's anyone who is ready to go back to what he knows, to what he's good at, to a place that makes sense, it's Peter. If there's a disciple that is more likely than any other to suggest that they go fishing, it's Peter.
There's something comforting about being where you're competent.
Especially if you can't get that look on Jesus's face out of your mind.
And maybe that's your story, too. Maybe that's what makes Easter Monday so hard for you. Maybe that's why it's so easy to want to embrace the story of Jesus, but so hard to actually do it. Because you feel like a screw-up. Because you feel like all that hope, all that promise, all that good news..it couldn't be for you. Not someone like you. Not a mess-up like you.
Not a betrayer.
But you know what? If that's you, then keep reading Peter's story.
Because the minute he realized it was Jesus on the shore, he threw off everything and jumped in, going as fast as he could to get to the Teacher, who was busy grilling up the very fish that Peter, in all his competence and seeming confidence as a fisherman, couldn't catch.
And that's a good story, too.
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