Chasing the Dream

We're all chasing these epic lives - carefully curating what we show the world and sometimes, just making it up. 

But what the truly wise among us have learned is that the epic life isn't really all that great. The truly great life is in the things that can't be measured. 

I have worked in non-profits my whole life - with the exception of that season that I worked construction. I have worked in community organizations, hospitals, schools, universities - all of which had 501(c)3 status. And generally, that means I have spent my life working at the bottom of the community pay scale, with scant or non-existent benefits (with some exceptions). 

It also means I have watched many, many coworkers leave in search of all the things they thought they were missing - higher pay, more benefits, different hours.

With very few exceptions, I have later heard from many of those former coworkers who have said...they aren't as happy in their new place. 

In addition to finding the things that made them think life was going to be better over there, they found other things that can't be accounted for. Things like...toxic leadership, clique-y departments, longer commutes, facelessness in big systems, unfavorable hours, less benefit coverage, higher tax brackets...the list goes on and on. 

What they miss most about the places they have left are the intangibles - being known by name, having a sense of belonging, shorter commutes that mean more time at home with family and friends and active schedules, predictability of knowing your space well, being rooted in something. 

In other words, the things that don't make the highlight reel, but absolutely make life worth living. 

I mean, it's cool to post your bigger paycheck. And your new car. And your nice house. And your work badge. And all that. 

But what's worth more than all of that and can't be posted...is your peace. It's your well-being. It's your quality, not quantity, of life. 

And in all the years that I have been working at non-profits and watching folks leave for what they thought were greener pastures, I've also been watching them come back...for all the things they couldn't put numbers on. 

I've seen them take positions in other departments, take lesser pay, take fewer benefits, take unfavorable hours...just to come back to a place that they finally figured out might not have been the shiniest, but it was good. 

At the end of the day, that's what we're all really looking for. 

The dirty little secret is that if we look close enough at the lives we're living, most of us will find that we already have it....